In painful memory of Blue

I had a dog.

We named him Blue after his dominant pale blue skin with occasional white patches. Don’t ask about the origin of his color or his race, canine racists. I was 6 or 7 back then. I believed that dogs just end up at your doorstep if you are lucky enough. I knew we were damn lucky.

Blue was great. He was a better friend than all humanity I have ever encountered (I am no social buffoon, just trying to be honest). When I was young, a neighboring tricycle driver would tease me to tears. I remembered myself begging for help from paternity. “Help me tease him. Help me please.” I failed though. Nobody helped me. They were more attracted to the idea of laughing at me. I would weep, run back home and close out the world. Blue tried to defend me. He would bark and snarl. He’s a dog and he was physically smaller than humans. Blue would fail but he tries, something nobody ever did for me. Nobody took me seriously. It didn’t hurt so much back then either. Its only when you understood life, the memory creeps back in and slowly pushes a knife through your heart. It is painful I tell you.

Other times, the tricycle driver hurts Blue only to make me shed some tears. It was my pain that reminded him of his “superiority” and he thought it was pure hilarity. I would try to defend Blue but I will reserve safety for me selfishly. A thing Blue never did.

I never knew that the things that happened were preparing me for the worst. I never knew that my painful childhood was about to get worst.

After school, I went back home. I was welcomed by a whole new Blue. He acted strange. He looked hungry and ferocious. I still remember the details of this part. His teeth showed no mercy but his eyes were begging for pity. I know something’s wrong, really wrong. He ran for me and I ran away. I lost trust. I hid in my room and waited for my suspended consciousness to get back to normal. I did not expect what was coming.

I heard Blue whine his loudest. I almost knew the pain he was going through. I also knew it was his last whine, but I tried to deny. That night, I cried myself to sleep because I knew he was dead and gone forever.

At that young age I knew death and the excruciating pain. My parents said “he was not murdered, he was given euthanasia”, but I think euthanasia falls under the category murder. They also said that the day before, he was fed with “vetsin" (MSG) by an unknown entity that drove him crazy. The unknown entity is obviously known. They thought having a crazy dog around the house wasn’t safe or practical so they killed Blue.

You might say I am such a whiner and should get over my blue-skinned dog but I lost a surrogate emotional inter-species guardian. Imagine that.

The whole ordeal taught me things though. I knew there were lessons. I can’t allow Blue to die without reason.

Enjoy everything you’ve got. Expect them to live and be prepared. No hug or kiss would last forever, they will always fade too soon. Always look for the bright light. Focus more on the bright side but don’t forget the other side. At least Blue left not only me, but the cruel world where I belong. He deserved peace. I know his memory will not last forever, but I know it would live as I do.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

I have mourned for loss and enjoyed gain. Blue helped me all along, he always did. This is for you, Blue. This is for you.

(any reactions or comments please let me know: wingspan300@yahoo.com)

Senate Ring Wedding Bells

Finally, the highly publicized couple Korina Baluyot (I bet you didn't know she had a middle name) Sanchez and Manuel "Mar" Araneta Roxas II confirmed the rumors that they are tying the knots (or marrying each other, I avoid misunderstandings in political scoops). I think it deserved some research and here is what I got.

From hereafter, lets assume you're invited and you deserve to know every friggin' detail.

When will be the lucky day?

Its on the 23rd day of October 2009.

Where, you may ask?

UNDECIDED, yet. There's a possibility it would be either in the Manila Cathedral or Sto. Domingo Church.

Korina's Dress?

Would be designed by Pepito Albert and those of the entourage by Patrice Ramos-Diaz and Randy Ortiz. Of course, choose the dress before the church.

Why does Mar Roxas love the idea of "people's everything"?

I don't know. "People's wedding", "people's honeymoon (yuck)" and eventually "people's children" and "people's grandchildren".

TV coverage?

Of course, its the people's wedding, remember? Kris Aquino would be hosting the full TV coverage.

Any political interest?

I found no answer.
Anyway,the wedding is dubbed as the "people's wedding" and it would have full media coverage so go make your own conclusions.

For those who are really into this kind of stuff, you should start getting addicted to ABS-CBN which obviously would devour all the updates and scoops about this event.

I personally congratulate the pair for their coming nuptial! Yehey.... finally....


I really thank Philippine Star for the info! Click here to visit there cool site!
Thanks Weddingsatwork.com for the photo.

I'm with Revillame on this

Last August 5, 2009, Wednesday, our Former President Corazon “Cory” Cojuangco Aquino was brought to the Manila Cathedral. Yellow ribbons and tears were all over the country. The whole nation wept for the loss of a great mother.

On ABS-CBN, Willie Revillame’s noontime show Wowowee continued airing at approximately 3/4 of the TV screen. The other quarter was for a live video telecast of the convoy accompanying the late former president to the cemetery.

In the middle of the show, Revillame blurted out his feelings for the other 1/4. He basically said that it was inappropriate and I believe him while everyone said it was disrespect all the way. I know the whole country doesn’t want to miss a single second of the very momentous parade, but Willie's show was party themed and nobody can change that. The management expects him to make the audience feel happier and to temporarily forget all the problems around them. How ironic it would be if he was joking with a seriously sad scene plastered beside his face on national television? I think Revillame’s got a brain and he responded to what was erroneous. He also got great respect for the late former head-of-state.

I think the real problem lies behind the plans of the network. They only had to choose between airing their top earning noontime variety show or have full media coverage of Ma’am Aquino’s parade as a tribute. They could at least have chosen one.

Sure enough, after several minutes of the male host’s live revelation activists from different Tita Cory Aquino fan clubs protested their disappointment. As an official Facebook fan, I have to tell you fellow Cory fans, that he did something really great. He didn’t want to crack up jokes and look insensitive to what was really going on. He was passionate about Tita Cory. It was his ridiculously high paying job he was risking their while commenting on the network’s decisions.

On an interview, I saw the MTRCB say they were still deciding if sanctions were necessary and what they would be. I knew if sanctions are made, it would probably concern the host, not the off-camera people. I have a place in my existence for MTRCB. I think of them as the agency that works so publicly. Well, what do you expect, they work with mass media but please take in mind what could have happened if the fiesta-themed Wowowee continued its joyous celebration of money-giving while simultaneously showing the heart-breaking travelling convoy of the late former-president.

I became a fan of Sir Willie’s actions not immediately, but after several repetitive thorough thinking. I hope most would do the same. Rash judgment is not an excuse for harsh conclusions.
People please do not be shallow.

(If you have any comment, either constructive, deconstructive or destructive, feel free to share it with me at 09166805403.)

Lessons from H1N1

Chemistry nerd joke:

Sri (pronounced ‘shray’): What is the geometric shape of NH3?
Benedict: How about H1N1?
Class: Hahahaha…

The Influenza A H1N1 scare’s fame is quickly fading so I figured out it’s the best time to reminisce its time in the headlines and apply its story to my life.

I consider every challenge a learning experience. I try to so I would end up thinking that I gained something even when I lost. In the time of the big and scary A H1N1 virus panic, I learned something. Something the books call optimism.

Our school was not spared form the virus. We had to suspend classes for 10 days because of an unaware victim’s visit and type 3 dengue scares which deprived the teachers of valuable teaching time and saved us from boatloads of important information for a week. Of course, no week is given away for free. Because of the change in the school year’s schedule, we had to learn all the lessons in lesser days which I and my friends call cramming.
When our Math 4 (we had one Math subject for the first year and 2 for the second year) teacher told us that she already passed the first quarter’s grade, we all gasped in fear. She then gracefully continued, “I am so sorry to tell you but there are many 5’s, 4’s and 3’s flooding my grade sheet.”

We fainted.

We found out that our first quarter grades were the worst she had ever seen in years. Wow, ma’am, helpful. Of course, it was not her fault. She was excellent in teaching. It was only the information overload because of the scarce school time that got the best of us.
It’s all in these atrocities that I learned optimism. All the low scores made us forget that it was only the first quarter. We had another three quarters to change the color of our report cards.
I may get substandard scores in several subjects but who cares. It doesn’t cease my existence anyway. As Jessica Zafra taught me, what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. There is more to life than Math 4 or Physics 2 or Microbiology or even Research 1. I believe there is a non-academic identity, a non-rational being of humanity inside all of us. All I have to do is exploit that identity and make it transform my negativity to positivity.

I deserve to escape the world of learning sometimes and to enjoy what I already know, a time where I could thank my human instincts (such as eat any edible matter) to please myself. I should not be depressed. I may not have done my best but I learned the consequences. I learned and that’s good.

So please, my fellow academics, let us all take time to close our eyes and follow our instincts. Let us all laugh at things we think is funny and remember the past hilarities that we didn’t have time to giggle at before. Let us make ourselves happy. We deserve to be. Let us shake all flakes of stress and dandruff of our workaholic asses.

We work so hard so we can party harder, di’ ba?

Computer Malware: Yet another essay project

The project for Comp SCI:

Computer malware. Yes, another computer term and another geek dictionary entry to explore. So what is malware anyway? Malware is actually an abbreviation of the term malicious software. It is usually found on the internet, from downloads, freeware programs and browser toolbars. They try to enter computer systems when they could. They display ads that give the authors revenue; they are substandard and tend to detrimentally affect the system’s processes. When you try to uninstall this kind of software, they tend to hide deep into your system. Removing them is exponentially harder than installing them.

On an article by Elinor Mills entitled “Was Twitter, Facebook denial-of-service the result of attack on a single account?” published last August 7, 2009, a case of hijacking was reported to the U.S. based websites. According to the article, a Georgian blogger with the username of Cyxymu could not access his online accounts on Twitter, Facebook, LiveJournal and Google’s Blogger for a whole Tuesday. The hijacker sent emails to the victim’s contacts indicating that he gained access to the accounts. Investigators believed that computer malware was responsible for the hijacking. Several hundred thousands of computers had the malware installed and at a specific time, the malware triggered their computers to send requests to access the victim’s site thus overwhelming the servers.

This article shows how a malware could affect a system. It could be with a user’s computer without them knowing. It enters without permission and it dares to stay.

The article above also shows the destructive capabilities of a malware. It shows how could they affect just about everyone and the way they enter (bundled through other things) shows how vulnerable everyone is.

I am glad to know that many of the sites like Facebook and Google still had effectively minimized the effects of the malware but sad to know the other sites had to suffer.

I believe in malware. I believe in its potential to create a better cyberspace.
Malware could be used to destroy unwanted websites. It could be used to distribute ads on a very good cause like helping African children have access to safe drinking water. I approve of malware as a mean, it is the reason behind I despise.
Malware is malicious. That’s a given. It installs on computers of helpless people for benefit of the ruthless.

Even malware has its unofficial classifications. We have the adware which is the type of malware that intends to cover up your screen with large amount of advertisements; pop-ups, pop-unders, ads in programs etc. They’re all in there.

The second type is the spyware. The name gives it all away. Just imagine it as a person looking behind your back. The sites you visit, your e-mail account, your credit card info etc. This malware lists them all and eventually sends them to the author where he could use it for his self-gratifying means of existence.

Another type is the hijacker. They take control over the user. they go to sites you don’t want to visit, they send request to servers and/or prevent you from sites that combat malware. Our school’s blocking “feature” is annoying and could be mistaken as the worst hijacker there is, but guess what, its not malware. Amazing, right?

Toolbars. This is the most common malware of all. Maybe you have one or two installed to your browser right now. Your Yahoo! and Google toolbars are legitimate, they really are. The malware toolbars are the ones that override your default setting without asking and often shows ads.

The last type is the dialers. They are the worst type and you have to thank God for this, its uncommon in the Philippines! Rare is the instance where global illegal fad doesn’t invade our 7,107 islands! The dialers secretly ring the 1-900 numbers which could charge up your phone bill to heaven. The authors get revenues for their software’s dirty work.

Those are too many types of malwares to choose from I know.

Now in the modern days, where Darwin’s Theory of Evolution works its magic, people get smarter and tend to have solutions to big problems like this one which threatens the multi-gazillion web industry. Nowadays, antivirus companies are gaining interest in protecting their high-paying clients from malware. Just be reminded, malwares are harder to detect than other types of computer demons. They’re good at hiding.
I look forward to a day where malwares, viruses and other cyber-deviations are taught in History classes only. It would be good using flash drivers without having to scan them for hours and being able to surf the net with security and privacy. *

Poverty in Jaro Plaza

Our English project for the first quarter was to submit a photo together with a descriptive essay on the photo’s location. The topic was poverty but we had to write about it while concentrating on the good points and avoiding the depressing areas.

I immediately thought of Jaro Plaza. Every time I go out of the dormitory, I pass by several beggars asking for alms at the place or vendors of traditional Filipino finger food. So I got my camera on and I went back to the place. I took some photos and had them edited according to the rules of journalism (you may edit a photo’s sharpness, brightness etc. but preserving the reality of the scene it was taken from).

Here are some photos I got:

A vendor together with his son preparing
the bibingka

Poverty in all ages.
(This image looks posed but trust me, its not)

BEGGING FOR MONETARY MERCY. A young man
begging for change. He did not grow feet and could not walk.
He uses a worn skateboard to travel around.

The plaza is supposed to be the center of the city. A place where children play. Where families could stroll along and parties for the city are held. It was the Spanish-Filipino impression of a park.

The next step in the project completion was making an essay without showing too much strength for the negative. Our teacher challenged us to look at the bright side. It was hard. It really took me some 15 minutes of pure, agonizing, deep thinking. A process I very rarely do.

I came up with an idea. They never complained, they kept quiet about their stature. Contentment. They continued to live. They know they deserve to and they don't lose trust in God and themselves. Faith. They don't have excessive pride and they let people help them. That's humility.

I was amazed with how much I learned from these people. When I don't like the viand and I refuse to eat, my mother would say, "Be thankful for what we have. Many people out there would kill to be in your shoes." Now I understand her.

Life is unfair. It really is.